Oh Mamma, There's Drama!
Drama.
No, not the acting class that you took in high school.
Drama.
Real life drama.
It's everywhere.
Drama, Drama, Everywhere
Boy howdy! It's on the television, it's on the news, it's in the schools, it's at home, it's in the church, it's in the White House, it's all over social media, it's EVERYWHERE.
Remember that song by Don Henley called Dirty Laundry? Today's world is like that song on steroids. I mean, not only do people love to hear, see, and talk about people's dirty laundry, they love to CREATE the laundry in order to hear, see, and talk about it. I've been baffled by this for years since I realized that this is actually what people are doing- CREATING DRAMA. It's what they live for.
So, if you are the parent of a girl between the ages of about 11-19 (or older), you are probably nodding your head. There's the typical daily drama of what to wear, what not to wear, what to eat, what not to eat, who's the BFF, who's NOT the BFF, who said what, who stole who's boyfriend, who's cool to hang out with, who's NOT cool to hang out with, who liked who's Instagram, who DIDN'T like who's Insta, who posted what, who's offended by so-and-so's post, etc., etc., etc. And some of this is completely normal for that age. And I don't mean to just pick on females. (If I'm even allowed to delineate that there actually IS a difference between male and female. . .) Adolescents are WEIRD. You know it's true. They are completely caught up in how they portray themselves and being accepted by their friends, or the "cool" kids. There's nothing wrong with being self-aware. That's a very valuable skill to have. Being able to realize that our actions and perceptions affect ourselves and others is true and helpful as a disciple. But concerning the CREATION of unnecessary drama that tears down other people. . . ummmmmmm, just NO.
And what else do we expect from our children? Just take a look around. There is SO much drama being played out in the media. From the days of the old soap operas, to more modern reality TV, to movies, politics, and even commercials, there is nothing but drama being served up to our children in generous portions on a daily basis. Then we've got FB, Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr, Snapchat, WhatsApp, etc. This is where drama thrives and invites our children (and us) to participate. And we do. We participate. Really, I'm usually SO GOOD, I promise. But every once in a while, I HAVE to put in my two cents--especially to people I don't know personally. Oooooops.
So, what's the big deal with some harmless banter? I mean, you gotta learn how to have a backbone and defend your position, yes? Sure, but there is a limit. I'm sure you are aware of the undesirable effects of mean-spirited "banter" a.k.a. tearing others down. WORDS MATTER. They change lives. They either change them for the better or for the worse. Are our conversations "always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone?" Colossians 4:6 I'm afraid we must all say "No," they are not always full of grace. But that should be our goal.
I believe we should take a look at (and have our children look at) what we are trying to accomplish with all of this banter. The back and forth. The social media. The unending drama that we create, participate in, and perpetuate.
The Mirror
This takes work.
This means we have to pick up a mirror and really look into it. What do we see?
The list is endless.
There is so much harm in stirring up dissension. If the end result of our words, no matter what form they may take, is not LOVE, then we are WRONG.
Where's The Love
In John chapter 13, Jesus is speaking to his apostles for essentially the last time. EVERYTHING's about to hit the fan. Yes--these are some of his VERY LAST WORDS before he is arrested, tried, and crucified. Listen to this:
34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34-35
Love one another.
9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:9-21
No, not the acting class that you took in high school.
Drama.
Real life drama.
It's everywhere.
Drama, Drama, Everywhere
Boy howdy! It's on the television, it's on the news, it's in the schools, it's at home, it's in the church, it's in the White House, it's all over social media, it's EVERYWHERE.
Remember that song by Don Henley called Dirty Laundry? Today's world is like that song on steroids. I mean, not only do people love to hear, see, and talk about people's dirty laundry, they love to CREATE the laundry in order to hear, see, and talk about it. I've been baffled by this for years since I realized that this is actually what people are doing- CREATING DRAMA. It's what they live for.
So, if you are the parent of a girl between the ages of about 11-19 (or older), you are probably nodding your head. There's the typical daily drama of what to wear, what not to wear, what to eat, what not to eat, who's the BFF, who's NOT the BFF, who said what, who stole who's boyfriend, who's cool to hang out with, who's NOT cool to hang out with, who liked who's Instagram, who DIDN'T like who's Insta, who posted what, who's offended by so-and-so's post, etc., etc., etc. And some of this is completely normal for that age. And I don't mean to just pick on females. (If I'm even allowed to delineate that there actually IS a difference between male and female. . .) Adolescents are WEIRD. You know it's true. They are completely caught up in how they portray themselves and being accepted by their friends, or the "cool" kids. There's nothing wrong with being self-aware. That's a very valuable skill to have. Being able to realize that our actions and perceptions affect ourselves and others is true and helpful as a disciple. But concerning the CREATION of unnecessary drama that tears down other people. . . ummmmmmm, just NO.
And what else do we expect from our children? Just take a look around. There is SO much drama being played out in the media. From the days of the old soap operas, to more modern reality TV, to movies, politics, and even commercials, there is nothing but drama being served up to our children in generous portions on a daily basis. Then we've got FB, Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr, Snapchat, WhatsApp, etc. This is where drama thrives and invites our children (and us) to participate. And we do. We participate. Really, I'm usually SO GOOD, I promise. But every once in a while, I HAVE to put in my two cents--especially to people I don't know personally. Oooooops.
So, what's the big deal with some harmless banter? I mean, you gotta learn how to have a backbone and defend your position, yes? Sure, but there is a limit. I'm sure you are aware of the undesirable effects of mean-spirited "banter" a.k.a. tearing others down. WORDS MATTER. They change lives. They either change them for the better or for the worse. Are our conversations "always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone?" Colossians 4:6 I'm afraid we must all say "No," they are not always full of grace. But that should be our goal.
I believe we should take a look at (and have our children look at) what we are trying to accomplish with all of this banter. The back and forth. The social media. The unending drama that we create, participate in, and perpetuate.
The Mirror
This takes work.
This means we have to pick up a mirror and really look into it. What do we see?
- Do we see someone who is out for personal gain?
- Do we see someone who is putting others before himself?
- Do we see someone who is manipulative?
- Do we see someone who is honest?
- Do we see someone who has a low opinion of himself?
- Do we see someone who God loves so much that his Son died for him?
- Do we see someone seeking attention/taking?
- Do we see someone seeking to give attention to others/giving?
- Do we see someone seeking to tear down?
- Do we see someone seeking to build up?
The list is endless.
There is so much harm in stirring up dissension. If the end result of our words, no matter what form they may take, is not LOVE, then we are WRONG.
Where's The Love
In John chapter 13, Jesus is speaking to his apostles for essentially the last time. EVERYTHING's about to hit the fan. Yes--these are some of his VERY LAST WORDS before he is arrested, tried, and crucified. Listen to this:
34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34-35
Love one another.
Love.
That's a big word.
It gets used a lot.
But how can we define it? HOW do we love one another?
Well first off, Jesus gives this command after he has washed the feet of the apostles. JESUS WASHED THE APOSTLES FEET! He washed the feet of John, "the disciple whom Jesus loved." He washed the feet of Peter whom he predicted would disown him three times in verse 38! He washed the feet of Judas WHO WOULD BETRAY HIM to his enemies immediately following verses 21-30! WHAAAAA. . . .?
This is amazing. This is incredible.
The Dos and Don'ts of Love
So what does that have to do with us? Should we go around washing each other's feet? Not necessarily. But Paul does explain love in action beautifully in Romans 12.
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:9-21
SO many good things! If we could only resolve to do them!
- Does participating in drama include honoring one another above ourselves? I don't see how it can.
- Does creating drama or participating in it bless those who may be persecuting you? I can't see it.
- Does creation of drama involve being conceited? Certainly can.
- Does the creation and perpetuation of drama leave room for "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone?" NO.
- Is the end result of most drama LOVE? NO.
Love is not drama. Save the drama for the theater.
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